The protracted rivalry between India and Pakistan has become almost a source of comedy. The two neighbors, since their appearances as two different nations on the Global map, have been in continuous tug of war. For nearly 7 decades, Pakistan and India have remained engaged in one or another dispute, including three major wars over Kashmir.

Though no war served as a final solution to the dispute, the two Nuclear countries appear to persist on the same attitude and are prepared to take on each other as following the Uri attack, India began parroting this old moth-eaten tirade again.

The Onion, an American news satire organization that publishes articles on international, national, and local news depicted the ongoing tensions in a rather satirical manner but believe it or not, the satire reflects exactly the prevalent reality on the grounds.

The video shows a news caster taking updates from the correspondent who is  stationed at the Wagah Border. Though the reporter describes the conditions hilariously, we can relate to it very easily.

“If diplomacy does not work, is there any other way that you see to resolve this conflict without violence?” the anchor asked.

“Yes, there is one possibility here that people are holding out hope for. Since the fighting began, the natural shifting of continental plates has separated India and Pakistan a hundredth of a centimeter. So if a resolution is not reached within eight hundred billion years, the border may separate ending this conflict without bloodshed,” answered the reporter.

When asked about how the civilians are coping with the crisis, the reporter said “Mostly by growing old and dying.”