The matchmaking industry has started receiving a lot of criticism for its archaic and tiresome ways, especially since women today are more educated than ever!
One such woman is Ms Tania Rashid who is an educationalist, with a specific drive to better the educational prospects for street children. She is also a strong advocate for gender issues and she has turned the tables of the entire shaadi industry with one apt and witty Facebook post!
In an interview with MangoBaaz, she gave a little background to the ad, “The idea for this post came when some of my girlfriends and I were exchanging notes over the dinner table on the rishta requirements of and expectations from a ‘bahu’ by a typical Pakistani household. Through this status, we wished to turn the tables and show how unreasonable these expectations really are. It was interesting to read that many commentators thought such a guy could only be artificially manufactured (like a robot) or found in museums. If that is the case for men, one tends to think why it is so easy for our society to transform women into these ‘artificially manufactured robots’?”
The ad features some prerequisites for her friend’s desi damaad request and had a very apt caption as well:
“Kamyaab shaadi ka raaz: baray buzurg kehte hain, har qadm pay shoher ko compromise karna chaheaye, kyunke aurat, aurat hoti hai aur kabhi jhukti nahin. Shaadi na chalne ki surat mai, zimadari bhi shoher ki hai kyunke sirf woh hi ghar par barbaadi ya abaadi lanay ki muqamal qo’ot rakhta hai”
With a list of acceptable traits and features;
- Biwi aur uske waldain ki farmabardari aur khidmat karta ho (yeh uska farz hai aur Jannat janay ka zariya bhi) aur unse dheeme lehjay mai baat karay
- Sughar (gharelu kaam kaaj atay hoon)–Should be able to cook a variety of dishes eg. korma, biryani, other desi khanay etc.
- Biwi kay waldain kay ghar rahaish pay razamand
It also showcased a list of the stereotypical policing women and girls face when their rishtas are in question:
- Fahash kapre (jaise: bunyan, nicker) pehnay ki har giz ijazat nhi hai kyunke saas, susar ko nhi pasand
- Bedroom kay bahir, maya wali shalwar qameez hi pehne
- Shaadi say pehle koi affair na rha ho
- Gher larkio say dosti karne ka khwahishmand na ho
- Na mehram aurto/ larkio say parhez kare, zarurat parhne par nazar jhuka kar baat kare
It further challenged all he social norms and dowry practices targeted towards women;
- Parha likha ho (minimum masters) magar nokri ki ijazat nahi hai kyunke zamana boht kharab hai!
- Roz roz apne ma baap say milnay ka khwahishmand na ho kyunke ab say saas, susar hi uske maa baap hain
- Saas, susr ko bata kar aur unki ijazat lay kar ghar say nikle
- Jahez mai gaari, fridge, microwave aur zarurat ka samaan saath lay kar aye
- Akele bahir janay say gurez kare, khaas tor pay maghrib kay baad (biwi saath ho toh theek hai)
- Har baat pay biwi ka mashwara leta ho (kyunke woh ‘aurat’ hai aur usay behtar pata hai)
