Ticket In, Ticket Out

The Election 2018 are happening despite the best conspiracy theorists’ utmost effort to the contrary. Now, what can happen between the filling of nomination papers, and their scrutiny is a matter of amusing potential and deserves reflection.

Like, what if Imran Khan’s is not found Sadiq and Amin, or either, on June 19 in the Sita White Case and is not allowed to contest the elections! This and more after another important matter.

The important matter is an appeal to three main leaders to award three party tickets to three controversial figures in the larger national, political and social interests.

We urge PPP to award party ticket to Mirzas of Badin, as they would be less of a nuisance while within the PPP. After all, they have done a few good things for the Party and Pakistan.

When, a few years back, Mr. Mirza swore on the Holy Book to expose certain things about MQM Chief (which most of the many already knew), this was the most effective use of Holy Book by anyone in the PPP. Before this episode, all efforts by the PPP to use Islam in the 1970s, 1990s and 2000s backfired and boomeranged.

Going forward, since PPP will have to deal with more frank and casual champions of Islam – like Allama Rizvi – having Mirza saahb in the fold will be very handy.

The second appeal is to PML-N to award the party ticket to Chaudhry Nisar, because he is quite likely to win both from NA and PA seats – and his being candidate for the Punjab CM-ship by PTI-PPP alliance can hurt PML-N more than the pleasure MNS may have in denying him a ticket.

The third appeal may sound radically refreshing to some, and oddly awful to others – its PTI’s ticket to Reham Khan.

After all, she has been an intimate insider and demonstrated to be an intimidating outsider.

She has added to IK’s ‘popularity’ immensely without even properly writing a book. Imagine what can she accomplish if she actually gets to write a book she said she wouldn’t, or didn’t!

Now, if you are one of those nitpickers who go after technicalities, and ignores the practicalities, you may say, “but Reham did not file her nomination papers, how can she get a party ticket?”

Well, my first answer is: What’s your next question! And, the second; she can be nominated on the special party seats for women.

She has after all so much more to give to both Imran Khan and the party! Whereas, IK and PTI only need to give her a second chance.

Reham’s name is something which I am sure will pass through PTI’s spiritual adviser’s filters also (we hear the latest Mrs. Khan is deeply obliged to Reham for vacating the seat and bedroom in Bani Gala).

This single act (of awarding Reham a PTI ticket) will be the most progressive political thing done in Pakistan by anyone ever. It will inflate PTI’s progressive claims and credentials manifold.

Now, lets have a bit of what if. What if IK is not found Sadiq/ Amin and his papers are rejected!

Well, my advice for him would be to join hands with Nawaz Sharif and start MRRD: Movement for the Restoration of Real Democrats.

The real battle in the forthcoming elections is between legal morality which is being enforced by the judges and the courts and public popularity which we will see find on the election day. The former is alien to us and doesn’t work much. The latter is new to the state institutions and they should better learn it fast.

Meanwhile, we can take it easy and see how long the Judges take to learn the political facts of Pakistan – quicker than the Generals, or they too will waste as much time and energy as the khakis did!

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Arshed Bhatti

Arshed Bhatti

Arshed Bhatti is a typical Pakistani who operates at very high level of confidence with extremely low level of knowledge. Being true Muslim he believes the real life is in the hereafter and urges countrymen to take it easy, and enjoy the talk shows. He writes songs, satire and fake non-fiction. He tweets @CivilJunction