If you’ve ever experienced the crippling feeling of anxiety, you know it’s not easy to put into words.
Many people live with an anxiety disorder, but there’s still a stigmaassociated with having one.
However, there are people seeking to normalize the public perception of anxiety, and they’re not all doctors and researchers. Celebrities are also bringing the conversation about anxiety into the mainstream by talking openly about their own experiences with anxiety disorders.
Actor Adnan Malik wrote a note to his friends and followers in which he discussed how he’s been battling with anxiety since Sadqay Tumhare.
In a recent Instagram post, Malik quoted his mental struggles as the reason behind why we don’t see him on screen so often. He further explained how frazzling the character Khalil was for him.
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“The thing I didn’t know about acting was that when the director calls cut, I should leave the character there, but I didn’t. I took Khalil home with me. I slowly became Khalil. I didn’t know where I started and he ended. It was also at this point that I realised I have severe anxiety and being in front of the camera exacerbated that,” he shared.
“I’ve spent a lot of this time managing my burn-out, embarking on new kinds of directorial projects, reading, yoga, developing a daily wellness and spiritual practice, working out and turning my intentions into actions. It’s been very rewarding. However, every time I go out, people just can’t help asking me why I am no longer ‘on the screen’.”
“I lost serious weight, would be up all night, worried about my performance, I would sometimes cry without knowing why. I began to resent my parents, disconnected myself to all my friends and relationships, and It all became too overwhelming. I had accessed my inner child and brought him to the surface and I was ashamed. I needed help.”
He went on to say, “After I managed to get through the shooting of the drama I decided to see a therapist. It was the single best decision I’ve made for myself in my whole life. And that moment was the beginning of my journey of connecting with my true, authentic self.”
“It’s been 5 years since Sadqay, and about 5 years, off and on, that I’ve been going to therapy. It’s been an incredible journey and one that I’m so grateful for. Sadqay led me to myself and I’m so much more comfortable in my skin now. I’m kinder to myself, I don’t look to be ‘perfect’ in all that I do. But that’s also exactly why I don’t take on many acting projects.”
“I’d love to do more acting projects. I learn so much about myself. But the project has to have a certain integrity and vision to it. If I’m giving so much of myself to something, it’s got to be meaningful.”
He concluded his post with, “For now, to all the people who ask why I’m not on screen anymore, it’s because I see acting as a way to honor myself, to connect to a deeper spiritual self and a way to confront my own demons. I can’t take it lightly.”
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